Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
17 year olds will be the death of me.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
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