I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
