well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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