i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
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