just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I deserve this hangover.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
