Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Randomize
