My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Randomize
