Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
She told me I should be a condom model.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Randomize
