i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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