we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
