butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don't even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It's what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
