So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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