I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
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