walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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