You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Randomize
