Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
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