she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
