After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
