We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
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