I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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