Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Randomize
