This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize