my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
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