Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Randomize