i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
