i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
