How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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