i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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