found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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