For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
