That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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