you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I just forgot I was standing up.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
