Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Randomize
