Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Randomize