Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
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