She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
