SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
