there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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