Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Randomize
