some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Randomize
