WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Randomize
