If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
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