Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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