She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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