i love accidental penises.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
