3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
Randomize
