Sry I called you an 8
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize
