I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Dear god my vagina.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
