we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize
