the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
