THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize
